Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Keeping Dave Number One
I am grateful for my husband. There are few days on which I don't think about how blessed I am that God brought him into my life. He is tender, kind, dilligent, passionate about things that matter, generous, a good friend, a good cook, and so much more! We both feel like having a child is an expression and fulfillment of the "one flesh" union that is marriage - our child will be from both of us, yet one person. Of course, I want baby to look like Dave and Dave wants baby to look like me!
Although having a child brings much joy, I am also aware that many women struggle to keep their husbands as "number one person" after little ones arrive. The physical and time demands of parenthood make it harder to prioritise their husbands' needs and desires. I am thrilled to be a Mum, and yet I don't want to be primarily defined as one. I am first of all my husband's helper, and one of the ways I help him is to be a Mum. This is one reason why even after the baby is born I'd rather tell people I'm a housewife than a stay-at-home Mum.
I know that many of my readers have been married much longer than me, and already have one or more children. I'd love to hear . . .
* Your tips for treasuring your husband, even in those early "survival" days of parenthood!
* Mistakes you've made and what you have learnt from them
* How you teach your children that Daddy comes first in your heart and priorities (after God, of course)!
* How you treasure your husband in the way you talk about him to others outside the family, and communicate to them that he comes first
And anything else that comes to mind!
Even if Dave and I have 10 children, it is likely that one day it will just be the two of us in our house again. When that day comes, I want us to have a deeper love and trust between us than we do today. I also know that the best thing we can do for our child is to love each other.